Fair (conversation with my self)

'you put alot of effort for something that you knew that impossible.'

'i dont think so'

'huh? did you ever think? nope...you feels not think. and you know better than anyone that feelings could deceived you'

' i know what i feels, and i know what i feels is right"

' if your feelings is right, why are you suffering?, dont you ever get it? you are not being fair with your self, you pushed your self to the limit, beyond her limit,you abandoned all your values, even when everytime she's bleeding you said thats okay, it just a scratch, you continue to ignored her pains. you shut me down, your voice of reason, everytime i try to reason with you, you just didnt want to hear me out. but everytime you were in pain, i was the one that came to comfort you.

"silence"

' how long that you think your heart can hold?'

" deep silence"

" whatever your decision, whatever you do, please, please be fair to your self"

" sigh, and deep silence"

" dont let your self down, if you do, i will never forgive you"

" silence"

Black hole

Once vowed to my self,

that never once i would let my heart be conquered.
that i would not let my guard down.
that when it comes to love and logic, i would stand by logic.
that never once i would gamble upon my heart.

let my self down and could not trust my self anymore.

it's a black hole.

Numb

She has no memory,
How she came to be here.
But as she writes,
it starts to become clear

Through the enigmas,
and strangest of things,
in this abstract place,
no feeling it brings.

Her fingers type the words,
that she knows within her soul.
her mind feeds her the thoughts,
but the body has grown so cold.

Ecstasy, euphoria,
pain and joy.
all emotions she once felt.
but now theres not any left.

Her heart is beating,
alive and true.
but inside her soul,
she is so numb,
about everything.

Indifference engulfs her,
to the point of no return,
she puts her hand into the fire,
and yet it does not burn.
She cuts her hand,
no blood she finds.
“That can’t be possible,”
her conscience reminds.

She sees the mirror,
upon the wall.
the one that looks so familiar,
and so does the hall.

She walks up to it,
it starts to fall.
she realizes this is her only way back,
back to it all.

Quickly jumping into it,
before it shatters into pieces of glass.
she tried to go back home,
and thankfully she made it quite fast.

to again feel love and pain,
no longer to pass,
through the labrynth of illusions,
inside the looking glass.

Lesson learned

The Lion King

[Rafiki whacks Simba on the head with his stick]
Simba: Ow! Jeez, what was that for?!
Rafiki: It doesn’t matter! It’s in the past! [chuckles]
Simba: Yeah, but it still hurts.
Rafiki: Oh, yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or – learn from it.