Fair (conversation with my self)

'you put alot of effort for something that you knew that impossible.'

'i dont think so'

'huh? did you ever think? nope...you feels not think. and you know better than anyone that feelings could deceived you'

' i know what i feels, and i know what i feels is right"

' if your feelings is right, why are you suffering?, dont you ever get it? you are not being fair with your self, you pushed your self to the limit, beyond her limit,you abandoned all your values, even when everytime she's bleeding you said thats okay, it just a scratch, you continue to ignored her pains. you shut me down, your voice of reason, everytime i try to reason with you, you just didnt want to hear me out. but everytime you were in pain, i was the one that came to comfort you.

"silence"

' how long that you think your heart can hold?'

" deep silence"

" whatever your decision, whatever you do, please, please be fair to your self"

" sigh, and deep silence"

" dont let your self down, if you do, i will never forgive you"

" silence"

Fine (conversation with my self)

What are you feeling?

Im fine.

Are you happy?

Im fine

So you are not happy then?

Im fine

Are you sad?

Try not to. Im fine.

Are you mad?

just cant think mad. Im fine.

So what exactly do you feel?

Im fine. fine. fine.fine.

Why you put too much fine in your answer?

Just in case you ask again.

Is there some thing upset you?

Some thing up set me and some thing just dont, what is the different anyway? im still fine.

What your mind telling you?

I ought to be fine.

What your heart telling you?

I will be fine.

So are you trying to be brave?

Im not brave enough, but im just fine enough.

Are you tired?

"smile"..

Why are u smiling? are you tired?

"smile. again" ...

Why you keep on smiling? and not answering my question? ok i repeat my question for the third time. tell me are you tired?

" still smiling, now with a big grin"...

Why are you silently smiling?and still not answering???